Ever put yourself in a situation where you are not getting the love you want the way you want but you are sticking around hoping for the best. Maybe this is a cliché.
Ever been with someone that does not want to define the relationship, make it exclusive but still wants you. Time wasters, time pushers? No girl, they do not want you, you are his ho.
You realize you are his ho because of the minimal effort he puts in you. He’s so nice to you but every time you want to define the relationship, he is not ready. Girl it’s not that he’s not ready; he does not want you like you do. Again you are his ho.
At the same time, this type of guy does not hide that he has many options and you are the least of them.
You are always making plans to meet up, dates, keep the conversation going and the only time he actually does something is when its beneficial to him.
Lately I have been trying not to include personal experiences in my articles but I cannot help it. Here it goes:
I realized I was Mr Man’s ho when his friend’s girlfriend spoke about the many trips they had been too with different girls. That day I hoped she was drunk but she was sober as a judge, clear minded, knew what she was talking about. I didn’t matter, guess she wanted me to know.
This girl had seen Mr Man with a lot of girls and was meeting me for the first time. It hit me instantly that in her head she’s laughing at me because she knows the shit he gets up to when he is not with me.
Here I was thinking we are making progress, gosh we acted like the perfect couple but I’m all about defining relationships.
You will go about telling everybody you are his girlfriend yet he blatantly denies it.
Each time I asked him about where we stand; boy would just stammer and tell me to have faith, lol ironic right.
There were days I was ready to let go but it’s like he sensed it and would always smooth talk his way back.
Totally understood Ashanti when she said “When I get the strength to leave you, always tell me that you need me” in Foolish.
I woke up one day, looked myself in the mirror, gosh I am so pretty, why am I letting this boy treat me like trash. I am a strong, empowered woman, why am I letting him make me a laughing stock honestly.
At that point I decided “I’m not your ho?” enough was enough.
Many a times we stay in “situationships” where men make you feel wanted but never step up to it. Because as women we have this high level of tolerance, we wait, do “wifey” duties but still get the short end of the stick at the end of the day.
We invest feelings in relationships and people that give no hoots about you. I don’t know why its like this but I am tired, time to switch things up.
As we begin the year, reflect on your relationships. Don’t be one of his many hoes. Know your worth and move on from that bad situation.
In order to be free we must learn to let go.